| You're a Stepparent ... Now What? by Joseph Cerquone Recommended (Fusion Family Rating) |
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Audience: Stepparents and stepgrandparents
Topics: Building a strong couple relationship, child discipline, legal and financial issues, parent-child communication, rejection of the stepparent, adolescent issues, dealing with the ex-spouse, sibling rivalry, family holidays and traditions
Based on research with families with non-biological children, this book presents a strong case for realistic expectations and patience in the creation and maintenance of a successful stepfamily. Considerable attention is given to the role of the stepfather with advice about unity in parenting and fairness. Stepmothers are advised to make friendship the goal. Stepchildren’s developmental needs and responses are also addressed along with stepgrandparents' role.
Mr. Cerquone creates stepchild composites to illustrate his arguments to practice acceptance, patience, and flexibility. Grace and Bobby aid in clarifying some stepfamily patterns and create memorable interactions to bring home the author’s advice. In discussing stepchildren, his advice includes: focus on modest goals, aim for respect rather than love in relationships with stepchildren, and develop a sense of humor. The book repeats three themes throughout: have realistic expectations, build a strong couple relationship, and work toward agreement on childrearing practices and roles. Meeting these goals have led to many happy and fulfilled stepparents and stepfamilies.
- Reviewed by Susan English, M.A.